写作：大作文

一、上义词下义词展开法

围绕 topic 找上义词做主语、下义词做展开，并解释下义词。

词汇层级（上义词 → 下义词）

skills（上义词）→ practical skills / relationship skills（下义词）
practical skills → problem-solving、independent learning
relationship skills → teamwork、negotiation、delegation、empathy、leadership

逻辑闭环句型（说清三件事）

它能干嘛（动词）
它包含什么
做了有啥用

例：上义词作主语 Practical skills / These areas → 核心动词 would allow / include / put more emphasis on → 下义词展开 group projects that require teamwork、negotiation、delegation。

句式要点

N + 现在分词：time-saving / energy-saving vehicle
N + 过去分词：hand-made cake / machine-made bread / wind-powered electricity / solar-powered panel / profit-driven society
线性句子 = 递进：so ... that / while / put more emphasis on / in high demand
动名词：online searching / fact-finding

具体表达

There is no need for schools to teach lessons that are available on social media. YouTube, for example, contains videos that cover classroom topics.
Students are so good at using websites that they can do their own online searching. This fact-finding could be done as homework, which would remove the need for teaching of facts in the classroom.
Competence in interpersonal relationship skills is important. It is in high demand in the job market.

二、作文批改记录（两篇）

第一篇：教育变革（约 5.5-6 分）

问题：时态不统一（It would allow 与一般现在时混用）；overall ability 单复数；including → such as；which enables 主谓一致；These capabilities 指代太宽。

润色版：From my perspective, this educational shift is of great significance, especially for children's future academic development. It allows students to acquire practical skills, such as problem-solving and independent learning, which enable them to strengthen their overall competence when confronting daily challenges. Meanwhile, modern education places greater emphasis on group projects that demand negotiation, cooperation and delegation. These experiences help children cultivate empathy and leadership qualities, ultimately shaping them into well-rounded individuals.

第二篇：AI 与失业（约 6-6.5 分）

问题：the job displacement 冠词多余；squeezing out people's job opportunities 搭配不当；well-rounded individuals 与第一篇重复；combine with → integrate into；proper → effective。

润色版：On the other hand, the rapid advancement of AI accelerates job displacement during the current economic downturn. Its remarkable features — such as cost-cutting and fast learning — are squeezing people out of their jobs, especially online painters, whose works are swiftly absorbed and recreated by AI. Meanwhile, companies are demanding versatile employees who can integrate AI into their traditional expertise, forcing those who cannot keep up to lose their jobs. At this point, it seems that we have yet to devise an effective solution to ensure job security, indicating that we remain unprepared for the rapid development of AI.

语法点总结

时态一致性：论述普遍事实全段用一般现在时
which 指代与主谓一致：指复数名词用 enable
不可数/抽象名词的冠词：泛指不加 the
squeeze 搭配：squeeze sb out of their jobs ✓
全篇用词避免重复

写作 · 大作文